Real Reasons Men Leave Women
In a few women magazines and self help books, I’ve read that women should dress a certain way, talk a certain way, or cook and clean to keep their men happy. I think there’s some truth to that, however, like the Black and Married with Kids website mentioned, “This line of thinking implies that women have the power to control male behavior.” The article says that type of thinking also implies men have little control over their behavior. It further suggests that if a woman doesn’t fulfill these things, a man now has reasons and the right to walk away. The article indicates that he would have a subconscious, nearly uncontrollable urge to do so. However, I disagree. If a woman is unable to do the above mentioned things, it doesn’t mean a man would have to end the relationship.
In my opinion those are superficial reasons to end a relationship. I have yet to leave a woman because of the way she dresses, cooks or even how she performs in the bedroom. If you care about someone and have to make the decision to leave, then you should have valid and constructive reasons. For example, if a woman doesn’t help me advance my life, then there’s no real rationale for me to be with her. Why should I want her if we can’t grow together? I would also end a relationship when we stop enjoying our time together and that’s normally because either she or I became boring.
Another reason for leaving a relationship is due to religious differences. This is a reason I have left a woman. Though I respect the Christian faith, I’m not Christian. Some women believe that a real man has to be Christian. That’s fine, but if I’m dating her this puts me in a position where I have to continuously prove my manhood and worth. I’ll also have to be extremely cautious when talking about our differences in beliefs. If I find myself in this position again, especially where I have to prove myself, then I already know that it’s best that I leave.
Another reason for leaving are incompatible expectations. There was a woman that I dated, that wanted more in the relationship, but it was more than I was willing to give. There were instances when I needed time and space to write. If we weren’t writing together, then the freedom to creatively write was infringed upon. The relationship failed because she couldn’t understand my love for writing nor would she give me the liberty to do so. She also didn’t give me the chance to make room for her while keeping my writing schedule. It’s not something that happens overnight.
Lastly, I have left a woman because we both realized that we just aren’t the ones for each other. Sometimes, there is a weird and unexplainable feeling you get that says, ‘this isn’t the one’. It is usually felt in a lack of feelings, spark or connection with the individual. When you like someone and they’re seemingly a match for you, you can sense it. However if that isn’t there, then the only real reason to stick around is to hang out because of our mutual hobbies. After the fun has died down, it’s just time to leave. Though, it was good while it lasted.
It’s highly immature for a man to leave a woman because she is inadequate in feminine skills and abilities. These should never be reasons for relationship failure. If they are a man’s reasons, he is using a cheap and easy excuse to move on instead of telling a woman what’s really wrong.
My advice to ladies is to take time to truly understand your man. This means you should study him as much as you would if you were taking a class. Make time to sit down with men and have a conversation about what he really wants and also want he doesn’t want. At the same time, your man should want to know what you do and don’t want in the relationship. This conversation will build the much needed trust and communication for a successful relationship. If you can both do this and add an emotional investment then you’ll definitely have an easier time keeping your man.